Devoted to God

"I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. Is say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and secure your undivided attention to the Lord." 1 Cor. 7:32-34

Jesus talking to his disciples about marriage and singleness, "For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it." Matthew 19:11-12

I've long tried to take these passages seriously in my Christian walk. I've asked God to make me completely open to his will; that I would be perfectly happy serving my God in singleness.

It took a while for me to get there, to actually get to a point when I could envision a perfectly happy future without marriage. I had many dreams of my ideal marriage, but God has finally forced my hand open in this regard. Marriage is simply another gift that he can give or withhold, just like any other gift which he distributes unevenly. 

For a time I sought to be "open to the possibility of singleness" while still pursuing marriage. However, for me those can't go together, and I'm convinced that God wants for single for a while yet. 

I want to be spent for God's kingdom. I want to dive into the depth of giving myself over completely to God and his service. 

Many of the pioneer missionaries either began as single missionaries or soon became so. Many devoted ministers of the gospel who were married left their wives for great periods of time. 

Marriage is full of blessings, but it is a balance of cultivation an exclusive relationship with one person and (likely) raising a houseful of kids. Balancing this beside full-time ministry is challenging, even if the wife can be helpful. 

We're not meant to live life alone, but that doesn't necessarily mean marriage.

I'm not interested in the whole introspective discussion on "the gift of singleness" I just know that I want to be completely devoted to God and see that as most likely involving singleness.

I believe I'm in Jesus' last category of "eunuchs;" the ones who have made themselves so for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.

He's not talking about merely castrating oneself that that one is not tempted to sexual immorality. He's saying that some stay unmarried in order to advance the kingdom of God. 

This is something I have taken very seriously and believe he may be calling me to such a ministry.

I know that I'll be married one day, to my Lord and Savior, the love of my life, Jesus Christ.

In light of that I'm quite unconcerned with securing marriage before then.

I'm only interested in how to serve him most with the best part of my life. Come quickly Lord Jesus!